How it started?

So, here I am...... BLOGGING.

Two weeks back, I left my job. Not that I failed or was kicked out, neither was it about people or workload. I left it, for me, because lately, I have been questioning myself, Am I really happy, Is this what I am supposed to do, is this the best I can do, am I even doing it right??? I was not happy and felt as if something is missing!!

I was sure, once I leave, I will have plenty time to look for other options and think of what I really wanted.

From the very first day of being jobless, I started looking for other jobs, variety of them, remade my resume and did all that we normally would do to get a job (irony is; being jobless is not a reason enough to not pay your bills). I was damn sure I will get a call in no time, so after reaching a good number, I stopped!! Then I waited…. and waited and waited…NO CALLS!!

Questioning myself started again…. was it my stupidity to leave??? What if nobody calls me??

I couldn’t imagine being broke again. I panicked and got stressed. Applied for more jobs. And waited again!! But never got a single call, other than a guy calling to fill in a survey to win some million bloody dollars!! Yeah, I wish!!

I have a special way to cope with my stress, I do what I love to do the most- -it's simple. I love cooking, I need no reason to try out my hands on a new recipe. So, I cooked - took a photo of it and made my Instagram story.I did some more cooking and postings, cook-cook-cook and post-post-post!(Which took me nowhere). Meanwhile, I also had my hands on painting and doodling, which is my another stress buster. I am not great, but what I do definitely makes me feel GREAT!! and that is more important!!!

Posting my photos on social media reminded me of an unfinished business I started a year ago. I had a web page created with WIX (I made it because my sister and me were on a spree to start up something new and creative—these sort of plans, kind of comes and goes in our head on a regular basis), but as I told earlier, it was unfinished. I thought why not give this a second try.

So, I opened up my account again and saw that the page I had created once, was gone!!

“Never mind”, I said to myself and started with another page, this time my plan was to post my stories. I started by posting photos of my food and then moved on to my other works.

As I kept going, I came up with ideas: some that were there on my mind for so long and would soon cease, others that were newly made. I loved the sense of how I could use this as an opportunity to guide my goals. I noticed my insecurity and stress phasing out and my attention and focus on this to make it done!

The fear of not having a job and a soon to be broke is still there, but I started seeing this as a chance to finish my unfinished goal, which would eventually take me somewhere, where it’s up to me to make or to break and this time I am aiming to make it! I am not doing this coz I have to, but because I know this is the right thing to do. Better start it now, before it’s too late.

WHAT I WILL DO HERE?

Don’t worry, I won’t be telling any more of my boring life stories in my not so attractive writing skills,

But, I will make sure, my other stories are worth sharing. Never Ending Stories from my kitchen to the stories about how I fall in love with papers and pens everyday.

Thank-you :)

#blog #food #pensandpapers #papersandpens